Wednesday, October 6, 2010

Good Movies That Haven't Come Out Yet

Everybody thought Superman Returns sucked, and I have no idea why. Routh is a good Superman, Spacey was a hella good Luthor, that one chick was okay as Lois Lane she had nice legs, the movie had semi-dece CG and the story wasn't that bad, considering it is being treated as a sequel to Quest for Peace.
*the climax of QFP being Superman literally putting all the worlds nukes in a big bag and throwing it into the sun take THAT NUCLEAR AGE.
Granted, the movie was a little corny at parts, but still- come on, Hollywood! A movie with semi-dece CG and good legs, and you don't have the heart to fund another fifty of them? For shame. Anyway, they're re-booting the entire Superman franchise, with Zach Snyder directing. Here's the link, you blaggard. 
I didn't read all of the interview- I stopped after Snyder referred to something as a 'dog-and-pony show'. I hate that expression. The only time 'dog-and-pony show' is appropriate is if I'm paying $9.99 to watch it in 360p online.
Okay...other stuff...I ha't!
Snyder directed 300 and Watchmen. I can't blog about Snyder and not mention that I'm a dirty pederast and need to be locked up for my own good those movies. I'm gonna say what I mean- I like them, a lot. I've read both 300 and Watchmen- I know I should be saying that Snyder took the novels too literally with his rendering, know what, I kind of made it sound like a bad thing. They loo incredibly similar to the graphic novels, and that's not a bad thing at all. These movies kick a lot of ass. There's one part in 300 where it's just one long shot of Gerard Butler [sigh] just killing a bunch of people for, like, 25 straight seconds. And Watchmen has a bunch of awesome fight and sex scenes, and plays 99 Red Balloons at one point. Yeah, these movies are great.
*funny side note- Alan Moore. Moore wrote League of Extraordinary Gentlemen, V for vagina Vendetta, and Watchmen- he's also a lunatic. He wears Freddy Krueger gloves on a daily basis and worships a snake-idol named Bast. I think it goes without saying that he hated seeing his novels adapted into movies, but he loves money, and snakes, apparently.
Anyway, yeah. Good movies. Oh, and check this sheeit out. It's the trailer for Snyders next movie- Sucker Punch. I literally have no idea what this movie is about and I want to keep it that way until I see it in theatres. It looks like a total trip. Maybe I'll do drugs before I see it! Maybe I'll just do drugs...and then see...and then...see it...hmm...[snore] [gunshot] [jumps up out of bed].
Okay...other stuff, other stuff...ok. I ha't.
Here's the kick (pun intended)- Christopher Nolan is not only producing it- he and his genius brother are writing it, too.
Christopher Nolan is the best thing to happen to Hollywood since the Jews Spielberg. Every one of his movies is absolutely unbelievable. He knows how the fark to direct an action movie, and he's good on the small scale too- case in point (or as my roommate would say, 'point in case') Memento. I'm gay for Guy Pierce. But anyway [shuffles papers], yeah. If you haven't seen Inception or The Dark Knight, you're either an idiot or dead. And if you don't see either of them right now, you shall surely be the latter.
I'll give it to them- Superman Returns should have been a straight up reboot, not a direct sequel to one of the worst movies ever made.
*funny side note- on the special features disc for the original Superman, one of the creators of the franchise was actually, seriously unaware that QFP even existed.
I like Superman Returns, but it would have been a whole lot better if it was just a reboot. Still, it's a very underrated movie. Hopefully Snyder will do a good job- I think a good job is inevitable with the team they've assembled so far.
*which reminds me, where the fuck is the Superfriends movie? I wants it.

1 comment:

  1. James, I'm going to change my name to Guy Pierce just because of this article. It's beautiful.