Good Movies That Haven't Come Out Yet

SUPER 8

Steven Spielberg is responsible for some of the most groundbreaking and entertaining films of all time (Jaws, Jurassic Park, Schindler's List (talk about a laugh riot [boo][hiss])). J.J. Abrams is responsible for three years of my life that I'll never get back (LOST, Cloverfield). Now the two of them are teaming up (meaning that Abrams will be doing whatever the fuck Bergie tells him to do) for Abrams next directorial project, Super 8.

*Abrams was unavailable for comment, as he is required to have his mouth on Spielbergs dick a certain amount of hours per work day. It's a SAG thing.

Now, they're marketing Super 8 the exact same way they marketed that demon-whore of a movie Cloverfield, with an annoying fucking teaser trailer that tells you shit very little.Mysterious happenings going on, there's an out of control train, don't know what's happening, messages written within the trailer, government run train, somethings in one of the cars, something breaks through, Super 8. Cut, print. It's a known fact that Abrams had no idea where the movie was going to go after making that trailer. It's obviously a monster or an alien or my ex some other thing of the kind, but as far as what the monster looks like, where it takes place, what the story is going to be, and whether or not it's actually going to be a coherent movie, well, he's leaving all that up to his Spielberg and his design team.

*they're bringing in the same dude who did creature work for Abrams in past projects (Cloverfield, that awesome ice monster in Star Trek) to design the monster. They showed the guy the trailer and told him (no lie) 'Figure out a monster.' 'No problemo, amigo,' the guy probably replied. He's that weird guy you try to avoid at work but need to ask things of him from time to time.

Now, be not mistaken. Every creative step in this movie is all Spielberg. Abrams' job is to find locations and deal with actors and do what basically boils down to the shit portion of being a director. Spielberg wants to make good movies (essentially be attached to good movies), but doesn't want to take on a full workload. Why should he? I think he is fully entitled to doing whatever the hell he wants to do. He is the king (with George Lucas being the disgruntled science teacher) of Hollywood. And Abrams is definitely far from complaining; this is probably the coolest thing to ever happen to him [Star Wars main title theme].

Yeah, I'll see Super 8. The reason I'm not as excited as I was for Cloverfield is simple: the monster isn't going to be as cool. Even if a flying horse shooting green lasers out of its eyes came out of that train car, it still wouldn't be half as sexy cool as the poster with the statue of liberty torn to shreds. Simply put, the scale doesn't match that of Cloverfield, and scale matters with monster movies. Still, the Spielberg element keeps me very interested, so it'll be fun to see how it turns out. I just hope it doesn't turn out to be another Holocaust movie.