Thursday, November 11, 2010

Disappointments, Hope, and the Manifesto

Blargh blah blargh, the world of movies is a treacherous one.
The Three Stooges might have been the best idea for a large scale comedy in years, and it was not only going to come together perfectly- it was going to put MGM back on the map. Sean Penn (yeah, ok, whatever), Benicio Del Toro, and Jim Carrey would play the stooges. How awesome does that sound? I mean, everything aside, this looked promising. Until Penn dropped out. Don't get me wrong, I hate Sean Penn more than ebola, but he was most of the steam running the train. It was looking grim, and now it's officially dead because Jim Carrey just dropped out. What's...what's going on? What is this. Who are you? ANSWER ME! Then I've got this malarkey to look at. One thing after the other. It didn't seem like my day was going to perk up at all.
Until it happened.
Right here. Blogger is really, really frustrating me right now and it's not letting me upload the video directly, but this link leads you straight to the new trailer for Uwe Bolls upcoming masterpiece 'Bluberella'. I've got to hand it to him. I thought he was going to go legit with this idea, but he's going so far beyond that. Turning it into a comedy. I really didn't see it coming, and now I feel like a jerk for ever doubting him. What a genius. This man has finally realized that you can be a shitty director and still make entertaining movies. This movie might actually be legitimately awesome. All I can say is watch the video in HD, it will complete your life.
A discombobulated series of events, to be sure, and it has left this Cinemerator dazed and confused. But I must come to my point, and that is the first article of the Cinemeration Manifesto. I've been getting complaints that I've been spoiling movies in my reviews and posts, and I am here to defend myself. Cinemeration is a blog about movies for movie lovers and thinkers and hunter/gatherers. This is not, this is not the entertainment section of CNN, this is Cinemeration. I'm going to talk about movies from the perspective of someone who cares about form and content; I'm not going to lobby movies for you, I'm not going to advertise. Trust me, Paramount couldn't afford me. Granted, I'll go easier next time I review a movie, but I'm not going to write a review thinking of ways I can prevent/encourage someone to see the movie, because homie don't cinemerate that.

1 comment:

  1. You really have hope for "Blubberella"? Because that trailer extinguished any that I had in the first place.

    I'm actually kind of okay with spoilers. I avoid them if I can, but I never let them ruin a movie for me. I take much more joy in the reveal than the result. Prior to seeing "The Usual Suspects" for the first time, I knew who Keyser Söze was, but the reveal was so brilliant to me that I was affected anyway.

    And in the spirit of spoilers: